I love virtual court hearings. No need to drive to the courthouse. No need to hunt down a good parking spot. Think about how environmentally friendly these virtual hearings are? ...
There are lots of grey areas in criminal defense work. For example, our concept of “possession.” We have possession of cocaine. Possession of marijuana. Possession of child pornography. Possession of...
We know that people lie, but do they lie about really big things? Would someone lie about a rape? Could someone be evil enough to put a person in prison...
This is America, the freest country on Earth. But don’t let this title fool you; our government can take your liberty. Our government can take your house. Our government can...
What I’m listening to right now: When The World Was Round, Ian Hunter. The lyric that grabs me every time is “there’s too much information but not enough to go on”....
A petit theft charge here in Florida is a scary thing, let's not forget that folks are going to jail on these charges depending on the judge. Now, they're not...
These days, lots of court hearings are done virtually. Virtual court comes in several flavors, you can either appear by video conference on an app like MS Teams, or you...
An arraignment is your first court date in a criminal case, that tells you what you're charged with and what the maximum penalties are for that charge. Its an important...
If you've been charged with a felony in Florida, the first thing you want to know is "What's going to happen to me?" That's a good question, and it may...
Let's plot and scheme for a second about how we're going to get you off probation early. If you really want off probation early--you've got to plan early. That means,...
To convict you of possession of drug paraphernalia, a prosecutor must prove that an everyday household item was somehow used to ingest drugs or store drugs. The problem with proving...
Today, we're going to focus on the most effective way to get your battery domestic violence charged dropped. The way to do this is through a witness' statement. With this...
There are lots of ways to beat a drug paraphernalia case, but today we're going to focus on a common attack, that's the "knowledge element." After all, the crime of...
It can be a bit frustrating to be accused of shoplifting, when you just forgot to pay. Unfortunately, you can be convicted of petit theft just by concealing an item...
A criminal history will absolutely kill your chances of getting a job, we all know this. But there's another grenade that can blow up your clean record--and that's an injunction....
This may come as a shock to some of you, or sound like a bit of shameless self-promotion–but as a criminal defense attorney, I solve problems. Dig deeper into most...
The process of early termination all starts with probation's input. This process cannot get out of the gate until the judge knows, directly from probation, that the probationer is in...
There are three common myths surrounding Florida DUI's, and we're going to cover them in this video. If you've been arrested for DUI, you may wonder about these issues, so...
This video will be sharing with you a secret, not a 100% legal, way to buy out your community service hours. Also, we'll discuss the most common way to buy...
If you're accused of petit theft, or shoplifting, for the first time I've got some good news for you. If you play your hand right, this case will be dropped....
If we were running some sort of popularity contest for violations of probation the dirty urine violation is going to win the day, the big winner here. Because, most violations...
It’s pretty rare that you get a chance to meet your heroes. I haven’t. But years ago, when I was playing in bands, our band manager Sarah met the lead...
There are many different criminal charges that stem from possession of a fake ID, and their punishments range anywhere from five years in prison, to misdemeanors with up to 60...
It is no fun having to go to court and face the judge and prosecutor alone on a criminal case, especially theft charges. And at its core, that is what...
There are three different severity levels to battery charges here in Florida and some of these levels have to do with the severity of the injuries, and some of these...
Everybody in jail wants some sort of bond motion to be filed. And, even some folks who are out of jail need a bond motion filed. In this video, we're...
Sometimes, too much agreement makes me wonder. If you’ve seen as many witnesses testify as I have, when you see their stories miraculously line up so neatly, it makes you...
To understand the charge of fleeing and attempting to elude, we need to talk about what's happening out there with my clients. I had a client who decided to dress...
Petit theft is changing in Florida. The most common shoplifting allegations now arise out of shenanigans in the self-checkout lane. In this video, we're going to review the different ways...
Are our courts just paying lip service to alleged victims? As of January 8th of this year, we Floridians enacted Marsy’s Law, which requires our court system to keep alleged...
Remember those scratch n sniff stickers growing up? It seems weird that, somehow, you can put the smell of just about anything onto a sticker. Fruity smells are pretty popular:...
The question for today is, will I get gain time on my minimum mandatory sentence? And the answer is Yes, and the answer is No. So, it really depends on...
Florida will not let you seal or expunge a case if you have one tiny little conviction on your record. And by "tiny conviction," I mean something you may not...
If you've been arrested for DUI, its only going to take a couple of hours before one of your friends mentions to you "hey, you should get that reduced to...
Let's talk about burglary in Florida. Every burglary in Florida is made up of three things. First, you've got 'entry' into a structure, dwelling or conveyance. Second, you have entry...
I've been asked more than a few times "What is an assault?" People get it confused with a battery but an assault is simply a threat to do physical harm...
I want to talk to you about resisting arrest without violence, it's a misdemeanor of the first degree. Basically, resisting arrest is not obeying an officer's lawful command. If you...
Everybody wants out of jail, but not everybody can afford to get out. Even if you can afford to get out, sometimes it makes sense to save some money on...
Remember that episode of Seinfeld where Elaine dates a gynecologist and she complains of his “lack of interest” in her, and the running joke was that her doctor friend had...
There are two ways that you can violate probation here in Florida. If you're arrested on a new offense, a brand new charge while you're on probation, we call that...
Way back in the early 80’s, kids were selling newspapers on every corner. I remember one such kid would always be sitting outside of my church after mass, and another...
There are quite a few charges that are called "aggravated battery" and we're going to dive into one of those today. Its called "aggravated battery causing great bodily harm". Its...
There are several different ways you can get an aggravated battery and we're going to talk about one today. You can touch someone , yes just 'touch' them with a...
Lots of people want to know, how long does the state have to file charges in Florida? And the answer is, this depends on two questions. My first question is,...
https://youtu.be/yzMzYrb9f6k Hey Everyone, Stay safe out there. We are still open to help you and we are doing everything we can to remain accessible to our clients (I've even been...
I hope everyone is staying well out there. Our office is still open, but due to the stay at home order currently in place, our criminal courts in Central Florida...
There's a whole bunch of stuff out there that can be sealed, and a pretty lengthy list of stuff that cannot be sealed. So, we are not talking about expunges...
Here in Florida, a shoplifting charge is pretty generic, but it actually breaks down into several different crimes depending on two factors--the price of the goods allegedly stolen, and the...
Remember that old Hertz commercial from the ’70s with OJ Simpson running through the airport like he’s heading towards the endzone? We don’t want to be late returning our rental...
We got some good news from the Florida legislature in October of 2019. I've been defending criminal cases for 26 years and I'm not even used to saying that we've...
For those of you working for a big company, isn’t there always someone tucked away in some cubical who makes you wonder: What does he do all day? Some people collect...
Let's talk about how to start sealing and expunging your record. You're going to need to get a packet together and send it to F.D.L.E. That is really what starts...
I've got some good news coming out of Seminole County. The State Attorney there has decided to do their own DUI first offender program. Orange County and Osceola County, they...
When we're trying to figure out if you can have a case sealed or expunged we're really going to delve into two separate questions. The first question, we've got to...
Orange County and Osceola County have a new drug diversion program. So, this program is targeted at the folks that are basically first offenders, maybe a few little scatterings of...
The police have lots of power, but they cannot arrest anyone, for any reason–even though it may seem that way at times. We’re going to take a dive today into the...
So, you want to reduce your sentence or modify your sentence? Maybe some conditions aren't appropriate anymore? I want to talk to you about how you can do that. The...
Do I qualify to have my five year suspension as a habitual traffic offender removed? These HTO suspensions, not everybody qualifies to have them removed. I'm about to tell you...
So, do you qualify for early termination of probation? Well, one way to find out is to dig out that plea form. And, dig out those sentencing documents. Because, the...
Yes. I new and wonderful law is in effect. It requires a judge to early terminate your probation under special conditions. Here are those conditions. And, this is a wonderful,...
Let's run through some basics if you want to early terminate your probation. Keep these things in mind. Most obviously, you've got to have everything completed, right? I mean every...
There is no deadline for sealing or expunging your criminal history. If your case finished yesterday, you can start sealing or expunging, or you can wait until next month, you...
I get it. People do things they shouldn’t do. But, taking a picture or video while doing it seems like you’re pushing your luck. Again, I get it. Today’s...
We’re going to examine what constitutes a particularly serious version of driving on a suspended license (DWLS), and that’s driving as a habitual traffic offender (HTO). The punishment on these...
Driving while license suspended is one of the most common crimes in Florida. I know that you probably think possession of cannabis is the most common crime, or shoplifting, but...
Now comes the hard part because, sometimes, the prosecutors are going to object to your Petition. The problem isn't just the objection. The problem is they're also going to file...
Step Two is when you get the "Certificate of Eligibility" back from FDLE, you're now going to start drafting some legal documents that get to be filed with the court....
Let's talk about how to seal or expunge your record. I'm going to give you a brief overview of the steps involved. Step One is easy. You've got to get...
Leaving the scene of an accident is a serious charge and, it comes in the form of a misdemeanor or a felony--depending upon the severity of the accident. But, what...
Shoplifting in Florida is a crime but we don't call the crime "shoplifting", right? We call it either petit theft or grand theft. And, the reason for those labels is,...
“Faith is an island in the setting sun But proof, yes Proof is the bottom line for everyone.” Paul Simon, Proof Can you prove how much pain you’re in? Sure, the...
Our entire justice system depends on folks telling the truth, but the truth can be hard to find–especially when there’s no evidence to back up the accusations. How can we...
This section is FOR ATTORNEYS ONLY. This section is closely related to the Declination of Prosecution section, as we find that the venn diagram of witnesses failing to appear in court...
Yes, we've talked about the benefits of PTD or PTI, but what does this so-called agreement actually look like? Don't you want to read it first? Yes, and Criminal Lawyer...
N THE COUNTY COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT, IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY, FLORIDA CASE NO. 2012-MM-00000-OSTATE OF FLORIDA,Plaintiff,vs.MR. ACCUSED,Defendant./Motion to Dismiss The defendant in the above styled cause...
IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT, IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY, FLORIDA CASE NO. 2012-CF-0000-A-OSTATE OF FLORIDA,Plaintiff,vs.THE ACCUSED,Defendant./MOTION TO DISMISS COUNT ONE The Accused in the above...
IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT, IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY, FLORIDACASE NO. 2013-CF-0000-A-OSTATE OF FLORIDA,Plaintiff,vs.THE ACCUSED,Defendant./Motion to Reduce or Dismiss Felony Criminal Mischief The Accused in...
IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE EIGHTEENTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT IN AND FOR SEMINOLE COUNTY, FLORIDACASE NUMBER: 2003-CF-0000-A-OSTATE OF FLORIDA Plaintiffvs.THE ACCUSED, Defendant. ...
Who Gets a Hardship License, and When Does Eligibility Begin? As if the penalties for a DUI case are not bad enough, the DMV starts the punishments by suspending a...
Think back to elementary school. Didn’t we all have that mean gym teacher that “demanded” you obey his commands, or else ten push-ups? That same demand for ‘immediate compliance’ applies...
In case you haven‘t noticed, criminal defense attorney John Guidry has been defending driving while license suspended charges since 1993, but for a moment here we‘ll forget about criminal charges...
Diversion programs have been available to first time offenders for decades. As you know, these programs allow all charges to be dismissed once the program is complete--and that's a beautiful...
Talk is cheap, and sometimes the devil is in the details. So, why not show the people an example of what they're getting into should they sign on the dotted...
Bond Procedures So, a loved one has been arrested, now what? Before you hire me, you'll need to get them out of jail. Assuming you've never been through something like...
https://youtu.be/-pz17p95la0 Domestic violence battery is far more serious of a misdemeanor than most people give it credit for. And, it carries mandatory jail. It carries mandatory counseling and the counseling...
As I may have mentioned a thousand times before, it seems like we have criminalized everything. This new level of Big Brother strictness has really hurt our younger folks, who...
I enjoy writing these articles, but, I have marketing overlords that demand relevant content. Now, what they mean by “relevant” is, writing to someone who might actually hire me. This...
Everything seems to be a crime these days. And, everything seems to be so serious. When I started defending criminal cases back in 1993, several crimes that were misdemeanors are...
Have you ever been told, “Don’t just stand there, do something?” Often times, “doing something” is a terrible idea, yet folks cannot seem to let go of this impulse to...
If you’re a rude person, there are all sorts of ways to express yourself. In a similar vein, if you want to escalate the tension of a situation, there are...
How hard is it to predict the path of a hurricane? We have computer models. We have Satellite 4000 Radar Plus scanning the skies. We have people with Ph.D.’s and...
I’m not a huge baseball fan, but I’ll watch when the St. Louis Cardinals are in the playoffs (and, they usually are). Like many pro sports, baseball permits the players...
What happens when you agree to “free consultations?” Well, you get lots of interesting questions. I should parley these free consultations into some sort of stand-up routine, but these consultations...
Think back to middle school or high school for a moment. Remember that sinking feeling when you’d get called to the principal’s office? Even the vice-principals office would give you...
We have science to thank for much of our progress in the last thousand years. Any guess as to what is the most important technology ever invented? The wheel? The...
I went to public schools through the eighth grade, but for high school, my parents sent me kicking and screaming to an all-boys Jesuit (Catholic) High School. I grew to...
Science can explain everything. As I sit here typing, neurologists can explain how the light from the screen is processed by my retina, which is directly connected to my brain. ...
Driving under the influence here in Central Florida, you've heard this so it's probably boring by now "Gee, its such a serious crime" or "Oh my gosh, its so expensive",...
Disorderly intoxication or disorderly conduct are basically the same thing and either way, it's a bogus charge. The cops, really, just don't know what to do with you. Maybe you...
Criminal mischief charges come in several varieties. There are misdemeanor criminal mischief charges and there are felonies. It all depends on how much damage the state can prove and in...
Have you ever met that perfect couple? You know, the couple that causes bad thoughts to pop in your brain, like, “can anyone really be that happy?” They must be hiding...
If you’ve ever seen an interview with a doctor or scientist, they always prance out their white coats because it makes what they’re saying more believable. Now, if you add...
If there ever was a pretty damaging urban myth out there in the criminal defense world it is the myths surrounding the declination of prosecution or a drop charge affidavit....
You’re about to hear some strange goings-on, and because so much strange stuff tends to come out of Florida, let’s start with a true story from out West. Earlier this...
Some of you are too young to remember late fees. Late fees involved renting a $3 movie and paying another $6.42 in late fees. Late fees created that pit in...
For a moment now, I want you to conjure up your best Carl Sagan sense of wonder. Remember his awe at the ‘unreasonable effectiveness of mathematics in science’? Physics uses...
Carrying a concealed firearm here in Florida is a serious felony, it tends a get a little more jail or prison than it deserves. I know that's why you're here...
Orange County has been on the cutting edge (if that’s what you can call it) of helping out folks who have made just one bad mistake. We call this cutting...
Truth is a funny thing. Everyone thinks they’ve got it. Scientists think they have it. Every religion thinks they have it. And, its a tad curious how psychedelic drugs cause...
Failure to register as a sex offender is a ridiculously serious charge. Taxpayer money is being wasted as people go to prison for this and it should be, like, a...
Resisting an officer without violence is a misdemeanor. It is punishable by up to a year in jail. And, its kind of very often a fairly bogus charge. Basically, a...
This is kind of, well, an odd little tidbit for you. But, after 25 years of seeing weed charges, possession charges and I know its medically legal and, they're still...
Sometimes, the toughest thing to do is to not do anything. A common, thoughtless phrase goes something like this: Don’t just stand there, do something. Almost always, this is bad advice. Our...
I want to talk to you a little bit about community control. It is Florida's toughest supervision program. It is not easy. I'm not even happy to recommend it, but...
A pretrial conference is a meeting your attorney has with the judge and what's going to be discussed is the status of your case. Really, three things are going to...
There’s an art to giving a good apology. It is said that for an apology to be effective, it has to be costly. No, we’re not (necessarily) talking about money. ...
When you've been arrested for DUI one of the first bad things that happens to you is that your license is suspended for six months, sometimes up to a year...
You’ve seen this movie before and it ends with a mom crying. A mom who will never be the same. And, you hear this all the time–speed kills. And, you...
Its hard to believe that the movie El Mariachi came out 25 years ago. Its one of my favorite movies, and I love the director, Robert Rodriguez. Rotten Tomatoes gives El Mariachi a 93%. For...
I want to drill down a little deeper into the DUI diversion programs we have in Orange and Osceola County. So, you have two levels of diversion. You have what...
I want to talk to you for a moment about the different types of probation here in Florida. We have, generically speaking, four types of probation. I'll start with the...
I want to say a couple of things about a business purposes only license. So, you've got your DUI, its pending, and within the 10 days you went and got...
People love being righteous, don’t they? How many of these righteous people are actually correct? If we set up a cage match between righteousness and truth, people much prefer being...
Here in Central Florida we have a wonderful program called the DUI diversion program. There are 67 counties in Florida and there are only a handful, I mean one hand...
Just a word about warrants. You know, what should you do when you find out that there's a warrant for your arrest? I know that you've got to turn yourself...
Sometimes in life, you have to speak up. Yes, that’s what you pay an attorney for. But no, it doesn’t always work the way it should. And unfortunately, if your...
Know thy past and you’ll know thy future. This is what makes history so valuable. If we presume that history repeats itself, knowledge of the past will help us brace...
Any time several folks get together to form a group, there’s always a risk bad things will happen. One of the minor annoyances of people “organizing” is that they’ll end...
I want to talk to you real quick about a petit theft nightmare scenario that we defense attorneys have been running into of recent. Now, this nightmare scenario is created...
Howdy Peeps. Do you know how many requests I get for folks to “guest write” an article? Tons. And, I’ve never taken anyone up on this, ever. I have lots...
Its really not enough to get your petit theft dismissed. And the reason why its not enough is because people are still going to see your criminal history once the...
I'm sorry that you've got that letter from the DMV that says your license is now gone for five years as a habitual traffic offender. The good news is there...
I'm sorry that you've got that letter from the DMV that says your license is now gone for five years as a habitual traffic offender. The good news is there...
I want to talk to you first offenders about shoplifting and petit theft, just spread a bit of good cheer about this situation. And, that is, we can get a...
TV shows are everywhere now. How do you know what to watch? Years ago, things were a bit easier. You had three major networks. NBC, ABC, and CBS. The most...
But, here's the two ways that we're going to review. The first way is an attack through the Department of Motor Vehicles. In other words, we've got to get a...
We Americans can be a rebellious group. I’ll go out on a limb here and claim that we’re more rambunctious than most countries. To prove my point, take the following...
Everybody who leaves their hometown has left a few favorite restaurants behind. I left St. Louis almost three decades ago, but I still miss Imo’s Pizza and Ted Drews Frozen...
Why are some defense attorneys so expensive?\ Willie Nelson has a great answer to a similar question: Why is divorce so expensive? Because it’s worth it. Several decades ago, my...
“Awww, come on guys, it’s so simple maybe you need a refresher course. It’s all ball bearings nowadays. Now you prepare that Fetzer valve with some 3-in-1 oil and some...
My DVR at home is packed full of science shows, physics and cosmology in particular. Science shows have a predictable format: “Interview a few geniuses who have it all figured out. ...
True confession. I “secretly” hope is that you read these articles and say “Hey, John knows all about my situation, I’m going to hire him.” The opposite is also true:...
You have to look at criminal charges closely. Drill down deep. In a criminal case, don’t get thrown off the scent by taking the arrest report as the Gospel Truth. ...
Some of you “Dear Readers” are locals, so you’ve survived driving I-4. For those of you visiting Orlando and driving I-4 for the first time, your passengers will be exclaiming...
I hired a “friend” (yes, air quotes) to do my kitchen cabinets a few years ago. I overpaid for the entire project because it was helping a friend that needed...
Do you know how many people died last year in car accidents? Worldwide, 1.3 million people. How safe are airplanes, compared to cars? For the same time period, 324 people...
I’ve been recording bands and artists since my high school days, but I sold my recording studio back in 2010. Recently, I was going through a box of wires (junk)...
Big charges make the news. Defense attorneys love big cases because their egos enjoy coverage on the evening news. Heck, lawyer egos even enjoy the bought-and- paid-for attention manufactured from...
Storytelling is important. There are books out there that claim to teach storytelling, but its more of an art than a science, so I’m not super confident much can be...
* * PLEASE NOTE: YES, I’M PRETTY GRACIOUS TO GIVE OUT FREE LEGAL SECRETS, BUT I DON’T HANDLE CHILD SUPPORT SUSPENSIONS. PLEASE CALL A DIVORCE OR FAMILY LAW ATTORNEY THANKS*...
There seems to be a trend toward labeling everything, so that stuff we deem unhealthy is now considered a “disorder”. For example, it used to be that some people were...
I belong to a nice health club. Just by looking at me, you wouldn’t get the impression that I actually work out, but I’m a member. I’ve got that going...
Lots of folks have a pretty positive vision of the future of humanity–so long has technology is there to save us. Some people would even go so far as to...
Self-help is everywhere. But, which approach works best? At the risk of oversimplifying things, self-help falls into two categories. For some, the focus is on thoughts. Change your thinking, change your...
For several weeks now, my left index finger has been twitching. Out of the clear blue, twitching. I did what most people do, asked Google “why is my finger twitching?”...
[Yes, I’ve mentioned this bit of history before, but you love it so much it bears repeating] Two thousand years ago, there was a great Rabbi named Akiva. Akiva was...
When I was in middle school, my friends and I had some important debates. Middle school is that age when you’re not quite ready (nor qualified) to talk about girls...
Have you been to Key West? At times, I’ve found this place to be magical. Other times, its just another crowded, over priced tourist trap. Back in the 1990’s, I...
When I was growing up, all kinds of kids got picked on. Middle school was a hotbed of harassment. Fat kids. Skinny kids. Freckles. Any last names that rhymed with...
Here are some facts, straight from CNN: “At the World Trade Center (WTC) site in Lower Manhattan, 2,753 people were killed when hijacked American Airlines Flight 11 and United Airlines...
Sometimes, less is more. It is said that, when comparing business cards, having only a few words on a business card signals that the person is mighty important. For example,...
Its time for some shocking news, so brace yourself. People lie. People make accusations that aren’t true, or they make accusations that cannot be backed up by real evidence....
Dear Mr. Guidry, The police won’t really do that on a theft case, will they? After all, its only a theft charge! Dear Potential Customer, Yes, the police may end up doing that. Yes, that would be a...
Can you “know” the truth by reading a few words? Often, truth cannot be reduced to words, its just something you feel deep down (Are we talking about feelings already?...
[Dear Reader, if you’re trying to seal a criminal traffic ticket like DUI, leaving the scene of an accident, reckless driving, or driving while license suspended–this article doesn’t apply, we’re...
They say that if you can’t explain something to a sixth grader–you probably don’t understand it. Unfortunately, some legal concepts don’t fit nicely into a tiny article like this....
For those of you no longer in school, isn’t it great that we don’t have a test today, or tomorrow? Have you noticed that kids these days are taking way...
I was going to title this article “How Target Knows You’re Pregnant Before You Do”, but my mom mentioned to me that my titles never truly match what the heck I’m...
Some folks would say that successful negotiations involve “getting to YES.” I disagree, because too many people say “yes” but don’t really mean it. We’ve all encountered that dinner time telemarketer that...
There’s an old saying that you never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. Today, we’re going to discuss bad driving. Yes, all of you “readers” are perfect drivers,...
Not all cops are created equal. I have a friend, who’s a cop (hard to believe, I know), and he rarely arrests folks on drug charges. His form of justice...
How hard is it to prove a negative? Urban myth claims that “you can’t prove a negative”. Take the rather cliched statement notion that we can never prove that “God does...
A couple of articles back, I ranted about cops trumping up charges. Yes, my outrage can get boring at times, as it seems everyone is outraged over something. That being...
If I had a dollar for every time someone told me “Oh, its only a technical violation of probation”, I would be rich. Actually, if you consider the fact that 71% of...
Let’s say a child is on his death bed. He needs some encouragement before he passes on. If you’re an atheist, are you tempted to comfort him with a tale...
What I’m about to say may come as a shock to folks unfamiliar with the workings of our government. Our government officials exaggerate. Yes, I’m as tired of such cliches...
Two thousand years ago, there was a great Rabbi named Akiva. Akiva was heading home late one night, when the darkness and fog caused him to make a wrong turn....
Some things are simply hard to explain. Why is there something rather than nothing? How did self-conscious beings arise out of lifeless star dust? And, how can prosecutors be so...
I realize that none of you are pigs. That being said, let’s review a common scenario that will come as a shock to my wholesome readership. Imagine an attractive woman is...
God and the Devil were walking down the street, and God picked up something out of a ditch. The Devil asked God “Hey, what’s that you have in your hand?”...
To understand how long it takes to expunge a case, let’s indulge in a fantasy. Imagine an American company makes Teddy Bears in an Orlando factory. The factory employs teenagers to...
I rarely watch horror movies, but I’ve seen enough to know that most of the plots focus on young white kids doing something stupid. I define stupid as entering a creepy...
Have you ever seen a fist fight live? I hate fist fights, and violence in general (not liking violence is a bold statement, I know, I’m really going out on...
Is there any value in holding onto a particular point of view? Children seem free to change their mind, but adults face a bit more peer pressure to remain consistent....
This is Part 2 of my cut & paste Kindle highlights of the wonderful book Fooled by Randomness, by Nassim Taleb] Observational data is important to science, and Fooled By Randomness by Nassim Taleb...
Every 23 seconds, an attorney is asked: “What are my chances of winning?” Some attorneys play along with this game, especially if it’s a slow month, and throw out a number,...
Dear Readers, Have any of you visited a career counselor? These folks take a look at your personality via long questionnaires and make career recommendations based upon the results. Let’s...
Laws need not be logical to be legal. For example, does it make any sense that a motorcycle cop can issue a citation for failing to wear a seat belt?...
What if you were just told that you’re about to hear a “shocking, unethical, and unprofessional” story? First, the word “shocking” sounds like something straight out of The National Enquirer,...
“The smallest deed is better than the greatest intention.” — John Burroughs “All that counts in life is intention.” — Andrea Bucelli There’s plenty of opinions out there on what,...
We expect our experience with American court systems to be fair, in the same way that we expect our experience with the Chinese court system to be unfair. To that end,...
“Comparison is the death of joy.” – Mark Twain Our brains are constantly sizing up other people, and it should come as no surprise that there is always someone with less...
Every profession has its own language, and its hard for outsiders to grasp what’s happening, especially given the acronyms thrown around. Our military excels at the creation of acronyms. For...
Professional athletes are always trying to optimize their performance. That’s their job. Training helps performance. Diet helps performance. Meditation helps performance. And, drugs help performance. For every honest athlete, there’s...
I took my daughter to see Frank Turner & Gogol Bordello at The Beachum last night. Really, she took me. I’m not a music journalist, as you will soon realize, so, I’m going to tell...
People are putting way too much personal information online these days. Now, this isn’t a big deal if you’re the one putting out information about yourself–at least you can control what the...
“Know the rules well, so you can break them effectively.” — Dalai Lama XIV Every country on Earth has criminal rules, and they all sound remarkably similar. We Americans...
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been to the jail in my 23 years of defending criminal cases. Let’s just say plenty. But, I don’t know what it’s...
”m warning you in advance that this is, sort of, a book review. Technically, a book review would require far more thought than what I’m about to say, so let’s...
At times, criminal defense work requires we attorneys to keep our mouths shut. This is against our nature–we like to talk. But sometimes, saying too much may get your client in trouble....
After several decades of defending criminal cases, I’ve seen a few patterns emerge. Our brains are rigged to see patterns, even when they don’t exist, but let me share with...
I used to think that paying less for something was a good deal. Lower price = better deal, right? Now I’m a bit older, and my position has evolved (‘evolved’...
Anyone out there have a friend that transforms everything you say into naughty innuendo? I enjoy such banter when that friend is female (I’m just saying), but not so much when folks attempt...
Does the government understand it’s own laws? If you ask the elected officials who are drafting the laws, they may tell you to wait until the bill has passed to find out...
There are several common themes we defense attorneys hear from people unfamiliar with the criminal justice system. First, everyone thinks that their case should be dismissed because “the cops didn’t...
How many products these days claim to be “scientifically proven”? Proven to kill 99% of all germs. Eliminating 95% of all odors. Clinically proven to smooth wrinkles, or shrink your...
Everyone wants to hold criminals responsible for their actions. This “responsibility” has its foundation in the belief that we all have the free will to choose right from wrong. What if...
There are plenty of legends surrounding wealthy people. For example, people assume you’re happy if you have lots of money, and several studies support this. Also, people assume you’re smart...
When I was a kid, my mom had a list of neighborhood kids she didn’t want me hanging around. For the most part, her intuitions were correct, and my childhood...
Oh the times, they are a changin’. Every time I walk into the Orange County Courthouse, I see some guy asking me to sign a petition to “put medical marijuana...
Violations of probation (VOP’s) come in all shapes and sizes. Some are more difficult to prove than others. A dirty urine violation, for example, is deceptively complex. Even a curfew...
I have a few statistical facts for you, and I’m using the term “statistical” and “facts” rather loosely. Four out of every five citizens who are arrested for drug trafficking...
I’m sure you remember the financial crisis in 2008 involving Wall Street and fraudulent mortgage backed securities. I’m sure you’re sick of hearing about it too, but hang in there, this...
Science never seems to prove as much as prosecutors claim. Case in point: fingerprints. Yes, prosecutors make some pretty ridiculous plea offers when they have incriminating fingerprints. They get that...
Our government is supposed to be transparent. We have the federal Freedom of Information Act, and in Florida, we have Sunshine Laws. These laws provide citizens the ability to force...
After 22+ years of criminal defense work, certain questions keep coming up. One of the most common is, “Do you do pro bono work?” In other words, will I work...
“Cross examination is the greatest legal engine ever invented for the discovery of truth.” John Wigmore (Wigmore wrote the book on Evidence) “The age-old tool for ferreting out truth in the...
“Believe none of what you hear, and half of what you see.” Benjamin Franklin (I think) Unfortunately, violations of probation are fairly easy to prove, but there are a few...
Everyone hates a know-it-all. Through some force of nature beyond explanation, know-it-alls are attracted to the probation and parole profession. I have no hard evidence of this, just hear me...
The waiting is the hardest part, according to Tom Petty. I get quite a few calls from folks wondering how long it will be before the state files charges against...
Buyer’s Remorse is a very real phenomenon in criminal cases. It’s difficult for judges and defense attorneys to think of all the ways in which a criminal case can impact...
Sometimes, criminals can be smart. For example, consider the highly illegal trade of elephant ivory tusks. It makes me absolutely sick to think that such wonderful animals are slaughtered for...
I’ve heard folks complain that some laws simply “legislate morality” and as such, those laws should be stricken. After all, just because my mom thinks it’s wrong to do heroin,...
Most decisions by judges do not get overruled, even when they’re wrong. For some, this may only re-enforce their bad behavior because the fact is, challenges to bad rulings are...
Expunging a record can be a time consuming process, because you have to wait on the government at several different stages. For example, at the very beginning of the expunge...
Florida has lots of folks on probation. For the fiscal year 2013-2014, the Department of Corrections supervised 143,809 citizens. Our success rate was 56.4%, and it costs the state $1,825/year...
All the lonely people, where do they all come from? All the lonely people, where do they all belong? There’s a certain art to getting people to do things that...
Lawyers fight about words. And, even if we agree on the words used, we often disagree about the legal consequences of those words. Today’s case is an example of just...
There are more prescription drug arrests than ever before–primarily involving possession of oxycodone or hydrocodone. No, I don’t have stats to back that up, but you can just hear me...
One of the cool things about criminal law is that our evidence, disputes, and analysis are open to the public. All of our disagreements at motion hearings and trials are...
Forgive me for stating the obvious, but a criminal record will hurt your employment opportunities. A petit theft charge, for example, will limit job opportunities in retail stores because most...
Violations of probation can be difficult to prove, and this is especially true of VOP’s based upon a new arrest. An arrest is certainly enough to have a judge sign...
As you know, judges have an obligation to hand down “just” sentences. This is not an easy task, because our elected officials have meddled in the sentencing process, and created...
had an argument recently with a prosecutor (shocking, I know), and much of her reasoning centered around her repetition of the cliche “where there’s smoke, there’s fire”. The problem with...
Accountability is an important part of the relationship between our government and its citizens. Sure, we citizens can’t know everything, and that’s why a small percentage of our budget is...
How long had human beings been ruled by Kings, Queens, Pharaohs, and the like? Then along comes the first big experiment in governance–we Americans decided to rule ourselves. Now, for...
It’s always difficult to predict how punish will affect a defendant. And, it is somewhat life affirming when a judge discovers that supervision through the Department of “Corrections” has actually...
Sometimes, the heat of the moment transforms something stupid into something tragic. I’ve seen road rage transform into a prison term, and I’ve seen shoplifting upgraded to robbery. Now, it...
Lots of inmates are looking for a bond reduction. For reasons unbeknownst to me, some judges just hand out ridiculously high bonds. So, bond reductions are a popular, and necessary....
Nobody likes to be bossed around, but plenty of people enjoy being bossy. Most of these bossy folks work for the government. The good thing about bossy people is that...
Timing is everything. This is especially true of criminal cases. Unfortunately, not everyone has the financial means to hire an attorney right away. So, what happens when a defendant delays...
Who out there watches TV these days? It’s not very chic to admit to watching much TV, as such activities would take away from more “important” activities. I have friends...
Let’s say you’re inside your home. Let’s say the police are pounding on your front door. Let’s say the police are demanding entry because they have probable cause to arrest...
I grew up in a great neighborhood, full of kids who liked to play kickball and soccer. Now, when you combine balls and kids, you end up with broken windows,...
Many folks familiar with the criminal “justice” system are under the mistaken impression that, should something go wrong with their case, they can always appeal the issue later. There is...
It’s time for me to stroke you, dear reader. Congratulations for exposing yourself to important justice issues, issues that corporate news networks either do not have the time, or intelligence,...
I love Carl Sagan. He had a childlike wonder for the vastness of space and time, but sort of glossed over important things like freewill and consciousness. I think it...
The case of the City of Hollywood v. Eric Arem case has sounded the death knell for red light camera citations all across Florida, in that the Fourth DCA has...
Some folks would say that technology has made our lives better. After all, without video cameras in the hands of citizens, there would be no way to refute an officer’s...
Modern technology has blessed us with the ability to question law enforcement in more ways than ever before. We no longer need to “take their word for it”. For example,...
There’s a couple things you should know about human nature before we delve into the case law today. First, there’s the ever present Murphy’s Law. I don’t agree that “Anything...
Everyone now has phones with cameras, and the world is not necessarily a better place as a result. For example, we’ve seen huge declines in topless sunbathers in France, for...
Many folks live with a constant fear of police abuse. From what I’ve seen over the years, that fear is completely understandable, depending upon location, and economic standings. And, there...
Yes, the title of this article gives away the ending, but it’s the journey, not the destination. FACTS: Daniel Shedd is just chilling, drinking a beer, driving his mom’s car,...
Let’s face it, we have too many criminal cases, and not enough juries to try them. That’s OK, because most cases never make it to trial. The legislature knows that...
Last year, a lawyer referred me a case. Now, there’s nothing new about that, this happens all the time (And, I appreciate the love from non-criminal lawyers. Yes, I equate...
It’s time, again, to compare Florida’s laws to the rest of the world. Here in Florida, beating your wife–in front of your young kids yelling “stop hurting mommy”–carries a maximum...
Ever meet someone that thinks they know everything? Such folks present a unique problem for the court system, as judges must tailor witness testimony to only those things which a...
I’ve been in front of many many judges over my 21+ years practicing criminal defense. Their job is simple–to referee the game. Nobody comes to the game to see the...
Sometimes, you just have to shake your head and say, “only in America”. Take rapper 50 Cent, for example. Curtis Jackson was dealing drugs when he was shot nine times...
Some stories make me wonder what is happening to America. Some stories remind me that our government is out of control. This is one such story. This story makes me...
Sometimes, you can just look at a group of people and know “they’re up to no good”. These “up to no good” groups are not kids hanging out, covered in...
[Whenever I can’t come up with a catchy title for a topic I’ve already covered a thousand times, I simply add the word “again”, or “part 2” or “revisited”. I...
[if you don’t like philosophy, skip this article…] Have you ever had that feeling that its all been done before? Me too. And yes, this age old question is still...
For years, we’ve been kicking around the boundries of state to state travel for citizens who are medically prescribed marijuana. Americans take for granted our lofty right to travel and...
“minimum mandatory sentences are simply heavy handed and arbitrary…we should not have laws that ruin the lives of our young men and women who have committed no violence.” United States...
Some things bear repeating. Consider this article my annual warning to inmates that their calls are being recorded. To be fair, after over twenty years of defending criminal cases, I’ve...
Some things in life are necessary, but not necessarily legal. Under crisis situations, folks may believe it necessary to commit a crime in order to avoid some perceived harm or...
Every now and then, people tell me “Florida doesn’t have an entrapment law, does it?”. This is a legitimate question, because practically speaking, not many judges or prosecutors understand this...
After being arrested or charged with a crime, how long does it take to resolve the case? This is one of many burning questions for those unfortunately enough to have...
As the old saying goes, police work is only easy in a police state. Assuming this to be true, detectives in Iran need only an 8th grade education to jump...
Every theft case needs intent. Unfortunately, most loss prevention officers in retail stores just assume someone intends to steal an item simply because they’ve forgotten to pay for it. I’ve...
After 20+ years of defending criminal cases in Orlando, some questions are more popular than others. Simple, basic questions like: what’s going to happen to me? Oddly enough, this question...
The government loves to search our stuff. What are the limits of this power? The Constitution, of course. In a month or so, the United States Supreme Court will render...
It’s never fun being confronted by government officials wearing guns and shiny badges. This is especially true in places like Iran, or North Korea. But, it’s scary here too. Lucky...
Usually, I’m excited to tell you all about what’s happening in Florida’s criminal justice system. And, that’s sort of true today, but we’re not going to examine a criminal case....
Sometimes, these articles answer burning questions, but not today. Questions like “why something versus nothing?” may get answered later. Today, I’m here to tell you what’s happening in Florida’s criminal...
If you’ve lived on Mother Earth long enough, you’ve encountered a smart-assed kid that (a) has no respect for authority, and (b) knows his rights. So, how do police officers...
If I had a dollar for every time someone called to tell me their rights were violated, I wouldn’t have to work; I could just keep answering the phone and...
Historically, witch hunts have not been a good thing. Innocent people have suffered extreme temperature conditions. Now, the witch hunt has shifted its focus away from non-traditional religious practices, and...
Eddie Murphy has a classic rant about being caught cheating. He’s trying to convince his wife that she really didn’t see him having sex with another woman; “who are you...
“That ain’t workin’ That’s the way you do it Money for nothin’ and your chicks for free” – Dire Straits, “Money for Nothing” Here’s something you already know about our...
You know I love physics. You know I don’t understand it, but I do have some questions that need answering. Today’s mystery involves quantum mechanics. Here’s Richard Feynman’s observation: “I...
Here’s a few basic principles of any criminal justice system. Juries are typically the fact finders. Judges are typically referees, calling balls and strikes throughout the process. But, what happens...
I’ve been practicing criminal defense here in Orange/Seminole/Osceola county for over twenty years. [these are the kind of boring sentences that excite my web optimizers, so bare with me, their...
Have you tried watching a cable news channel recently? I can’t do it. There’s always two to four talking heads arguing, and you can’t even understand the point they’re trying...
Our criminal justice system punishes two parties–the government, and citizens (defendants). The government gets punished when it does something illegal in order to obtain evidence. Theoretically, such unconstitutional things don’t...
Whenever our government seeks to interrupt the movement of citizens, they are typically met with the question “why did you stop me, officer?” Of course, the police are at work...
I’m seeing a scary trend. An unholy alliance between the legislature and judicial branch dedicated to concocting new laws that make convicting citizens easier. Tiny example: when I started defending...
I love debates. Not presidential debates, those aren’t really debates. No, my favorite debates are philosophical, especially those that expose the intersection of science and philosophy (really, this boils down...
Let’s say you’ve just robbed a home, and you need to unload some merchandise. Where do you go? A pawn shop, maybe? Well, a pawn shop will take your fingerprints...
Once again, it seems like the juveniles are creating some good case law for defense attorneys. So, I find myself torn between having good case law (can’t put a price...
By now, you should know that these articles are not written for those of you who want to feel intellectually superior to your fellow man — there are plenty of...
Lawyers play games with words, it’s in the job description. Don’t hate the player, hate the game. Sure, we lawyers are easy targets for any number of legitimate complaints, but...
Have you shopped on Ebay lately? Why is it that one seller has something listed for $100, and that same product is listed for $300 by a few other sellers?...
After practicing criminal defense for over 20 years, I’m prone to telling a few war stories here and there. With that warning in hand, here’s what happened. My client kept...
Anyone out there watch ABC’s Castle? It’s a solve-the-murder-flirting-detectives show (a la Moonlighting) that follows just about the same formula as any other crime show out there. You know they...
It's never easy for a defendant to stand before a judge for sentencing. In over 20 years of defending criminal cases, I’ve seen my fair share of judges decide at...
Have you ever paid for a car repair, or home repair, only to find that it wasn’t done right? With folks living paycheck to paycheck, having to pay twice for...
For many years, I owned a commercial recording facility. After recording and mastering a zillion albums, I learned that one of the toughest parts of this artistic process is convincing...
The following situation has popped up several times in the last month, so let’s talk about it. FACTS (a): client gets arrested on a drug charge, and the cops want...
Rude behavior is everywhere these days. I wish things were different, and such changes start with me, but I’ll save you my broadway renditions of ‘the man in the mirror’...
At times, I admit that this website has plunged into the ultra-boring philosophical underpinnings of “knowledge”. The word gets tossed out there quite frequently, and yet we often don’t “know”...
The general public is not always privy to the day-to-day shenanigans of Florida’s criminal justice system. Fear not, that’s why I’m here. Some charges, on their face, are simply sketchy....
Some would say that technology has made our lives better, and that’s a debate for another day–but one thing we can all agree on is the fact that technology has...
Retail theft just isn’t what it used to be. Back in the day of smaller retail stores, thieves were forced to get creative with their attempts to leave a store...
